Reconnecting with cousins and catching up with the grandparents is always a setup for unforgettable moments.
If you are travelling to shaggz, these are 10 types of people you are most likely to encounter.
1. Unofficial welcoming committee
The moment you arrive and attempt to enter your compound, they have you in their sight. In case you passed by the shopping centre to get supplies before heading to your homestead, they will be on the lookout, greet you and proceed to give a breakdown of the biggest news and mucene (gossip) in the area since the last time you were around.
They are a good company to keep and are animated in their storytelling that brings scenarios to life.
2. Hustlers
The hustler maybe a relative who is always on you seeking money. They will hustle you for that extra shilling so that they can go and enjoy themselves.
People who are drinkers, especially, are the ones known to have this habit.
3. Do you remember me?
There are those relatives (the chances of being related to everyone you meet being very high) who will approach you narrating how the last time they saw you – you only had two teeth and baby fat.
They start with a classic, “Do you remember me?†which is absurd especially if the last time you were around them you were a toddler.
They will keep reminding you how they used to babysit you and how big you’ve grown since then.
4. Uncle with Slayqueen girlfriends
There is that one relative who brings home a different woman every year. He is young and successful but never has intentions of really settling down.
The women he brings with him may not be conversant with chores and as such, every time they take up the roles it becomes a spectacle.
5. Idlers on the road
These types of people can turn a casual walk on the murram road into an awkward encounter. They gather in places where you can’t avoid them and use their numbers to intimidate those who pass near.
They sit in a shade somewhere chewing on miraa as they wait for their ‘next big score.’
6. Busybodies
The moment they spot you making your way into your homestead, they have already issued an announcement to all that care to know.
They will find ways to get into your home and engage in small talk to gauge how you are faring on in the city.
Basically, they are searching for exclusives to share when they get together with the gossip clique at the shopping centre.
7. Hospitable neighbours
There are those who welcome you to their homes with open arms. They offer you food when you’re there no matter how short or long your stay is, you can’t avoid a cup of tea and something to carry home.
8. Prayerful ones
Prayer time comes and they are the first to volunteer. Even when the occasion doesn’t call for prayers, they insist that there is always time to call onto the Almighty.
Every moment is a blessing and they may get carried away by extending prayers to be longer than need be.
9. Well connected cousins
There are those cousins who live in shaggz and are well connected. They know where the party is happening and are sure to lighten up your stay with interesting ventures.
Be it that local joint that they have the best table or the club where all the young people meet to have a great time, they know it all.
They are the go-to guys for those seeking adventures.
10. Flossers
There is always that relative who is rich and is more than happy to flaunt it. Likewise, there are those cousins who have travelled far and wide and have access to the finer things in life.
A conversation with them can leave you with less self-worth as they blatantly floss how better their lives are.
Source: KENYAGIST.COM
